A lot of people didn’t know, but I have been a smoker for almost 20 years. It started out casually enough, where I’d only smoke when at parties or while drinking – but it soon spiraled into more. I guess that’s why it’s called addiction. At one point in my journey, I was a 2-pack a day smoker. That was when it was really bad. That was when I was in so much debt, but would scrape together money for a pack of smokes. That was a low. I would chain smoke. I would like about smoking.
This isn’t the first time I’ve quit.
Chantix. Chantix definitely works, but it didn’t work for me. I honestly don’t remember the second half of February. I fell into a deep depression. Overtaken with anger and anxiety. Didn’t know what I wanted. I guess I still don’t.
The truth is – quitting is hard. Addiction is hard. It’s been almost 4 months and it’s easier but it isn’t easy. They (whoever they are – doctors, experts?) don’t tell you that there are some REALLY hard things that you go through when you quit. Not only do you face anger and depression (they tell you that) but smoker’s flu is a very real thing. You’ll feel terrible. Managing your anxiety is difficult. It’s hard.
Regardless – I’m really proud that I quit. It was time that I reclaimed my life and started caring about myself. I’m taking it day-by-day, and when you’re ready -I know you can too. When you’re ready – click here for resources.
xo love kim